Feminine and Feminist – contradictory or not?

I would consider myself a ‘girly girl’.  I like shopping, dresses, skirts, pink, sparkles, and other typically feminine things.  My hair is long and I like to have it in pretty styles every now and again.  Yet there’s one thing I wonder; why should this be seen as un-feminist by so many people?

Often, people tend to think of feminists as quite physically strong and tomboyish, not feminine.  Even other people who would call themselves feminists look down upon people who like makeup, jewelry and other things deemed ‘feminine’.  But is this really a feminist thing to do?

I think – and it may just be me here – that some people take tackling gender roles (one of the things that feminism focuses on) the wrong way.  Instead of tackling them to make them less expected, some people seem to think that we need to flip them around entirely, meaning that women who would prefer to be a typical stay-at-home-mum, or who like to wear makeup and dresses, can be frowned upon, and told that they’re “not real feminists”.

This isn’t right.

Females are putting other females down, simply because they want to do what they want, but isn’t feminism supposed to be about letting women and girls be free to choose what they want to do in life?  Shouldn’t we embrace all the differences between us females, and support others’ choices, even if they differ from this ‘feminist ideal’ that seems to exist in some people’s minds?

Back to the whole feminine thing: I don’t wear makeup and/ or dresses (and other things) because it’s expected of me, or because I want to impress anyone, contrary to what some people might think.  I like these things!  I enjoy doing my makeup, even if it doesn’t always go right first try.  I like pretty things because I just do and I CAN!  What I wear is my choice (well, my mum often helps me decide, but that’s just because I’m bad at decisions) so why should I be ashamed of that?

So please, wear whatever you like, like whatever you want to, and above all, don’t shame others for what they like!


Thanks for reading!  I’d love to know what you think, so feel free to let me know in the comments!  You can also let me know your thoughts on the topic if you wish!

~ Elly

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24 thoughts on “Feminine and Feminist – contradictory or not?

  1. huckleberryfrienduniverse says:

    Great post! I completely agree with you. Would like to add one more thing- being a feminist could also mean you’re against the idea of a “masculine” or “feminine” type and therefore, the whole concept of being “girly” or a “tomboy” doesn’t hold and neither does shaming other people for being themselves or expressing themselves in certain ways. Not only women of all types but also men and people of other genders have the right to follow the feminist school of thought. Very well written.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Luna Cooler says:

    Those guys who say that girly girls aren’t real feminists are probably radical feminists. Most radical feminists believe in gender equality, but they think that to achieve that, the whole concept of gender has to be eradicated. (Have you heard of Valerie Solanas?)

    Liked by 1 person

  3. wordsonwhim says:

    Fab post!!!! Love this. I’ve always been the Tom boy, and never got into makeup until a late age. But I always love my pink, stars, glitter and Beyoncé. But even loving Beyoncé and her as a feminist, people always question how I can like someone so bold and confident enough to spread her body around the media when I’m a feminist. Little things like that bug me. Just because I think men and women should be equal, doesn’t mean I don’t agree on women doing whatever they want that makes them happy! If they want to dress in exposing dresses because they are unbelievably sassy and beautiful, they can! And that shouldn’t be assumed to dictate that they do it all for men. They do it because they’re confident and feel like it. Little things like that really bug me, people saying it’s all a contradiction. 😛 xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

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